Mastering Resistance to Setting goals

by Nicholas de Castella

DARE TO DREAM

A common block to setting goals is we avoid the fear of not achieving
them.

Inside we often fear that if we make a mistake or fail we are going to be punished
or ridiculed (usually from unconscious, unresolved past experiences when this
did happen such as being called 'stupid'). We protect ourselves by not taking the
risk of exposing ourselves to these possibilities (we unconsciously expect the
future to be the same as the past - which is highly questionable).

This head in the sand kind of thinking is the kind of thinking that tends to create
what we don't want - what we fear. Because we are not willing to fail we don't set
goals, don't have a clear focus, our energy is scattered and we are much less
effective. This makes us much less likely to achieve and more likely to fail. The
biggest failure in life is not to do anything. Not to live our lives fully.

A Heart Centred Perspective
Mastering fear is one of the most liberating and empowering things you can do
because we all avoid living the life we are meant to live because we avoid fear.
From a Heart Centred Perspective we let fear inform us that there is a potential
risk present that we need to take care with, but we do not let our emotions stop
us from doing what we know in our heart is the right thing. In this case setting
some goals for 2025.

The way we manage fears, is to welcome them in, face them head on. We drop
the old head stories (like 'If I fail I will be I'm stupid, worthless etc.) and feel the
emotion directly. When we do this the feelings will at first intensify and then
diminish and evaporate. Because any unwanted feeling when fully felt vanishes
instantly.

Heart Practice
Think of something that you would love to do, but have fear of committing to.
Breathe gently into your fear. You will often find it centred in your solar plexus,
just in front of your stomach. See if you can feel or imagine the energy coming up
into your heart (the centre of Love).

The trick in dissipating fear is to stay relaxed and open and to go very slowly and
gently.

Practice this for a few minutes each day and see what happens.

Remember: Fear is energy that is created by imagining a negative future
possibility. So always focus on what you want. What we focus on expands!